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- “I Always Thought This Was Just Me”: The Overlooked Signs of ADHD or Anxiety
“I just thought this was how everyone’s brain worked…” You’ve probably told yourself things like: “I’m just disorganised, always have been.” “I overthink everything — but that’s just me.” “Deadlines light a fire under me, it’s how I operate.” When you’ve always lived a certain way, it’s hard to see it as anything but normal. But here’s the thing: just because it’s familiar, doesn’t mean it’s typical. Everyday habits that are actually sneaky coping strategies You might be someone who: Opens WhatsApp, sees messages, gets overwhelmed, and never replies (but mentally replied days ago) Feels guilty for cancelling social plans — but also relieved Can spend 45 minutes getting ready but somehow still forgets deodorant Starts cleaning one room, ends up reorganising the spice drawer, then gets overwhelmed and does neither These things can feel like quirks. Personality traits. But often, they’re signs of a brain that’s been working overtime behind the scenes. Not because you're broken — because you’ve been adapting. Smart, capable — and kind of wrecked Adults with undiagnosed ADHD or anxiety are often functioning at a high level — and quietly burning out. You’re keeping it together. But just barely. You’ve probably built up routines and systems to survive: Making endless lists, emailing yourself, leaving sticky notes, writing on your arms, just so you don’t forget the basics Prepping for meetings like they’re TED Talks Setting 4 alarms just to get out the door It works… until it doesn’t. And when life throws more complexity or more demands your way — a career shift, a breakup, a baby, a burnout — suddenly the wheels start to come off. The “Oh wait… that’s me” moment Many people first start to question things when: A friend gets diagnosed and casually describes your entire inner world You stumble across a video on TikTok or post on Insta that hits way too close to home You realise not everyone else is running the same mental obstacle course every day You’re exhausted all the time, and you can’t quite explain why It’s not always a dramatic breakdown. Sometimes it’s just a quiet click — the realisation that maybe this way of being isn’t just “your thing.” Why no one noticed sooner So if this is ADHD or anxiety… why didn’t it show up earlier? Maybe, here’s why: structure used to carry you. School, uni, jobs with clear hours — all of that gave your brain scaffolding. Even your social life had routines baked in. Now? You’re managing your own time. Expectations are higher. And, no one’s checking if you’ve had lunch or booked that appointment. And suddenly your brain is the manager, the assistant, and the overwhelmed intern — all in one. The quiet mental load no one else sees Let’s name it: You’re always a bit behind, even when nothing is on fire You want to reply to people, but the pressure makes it harder to even open the chat You’re amazing in crisis but struggle with the basics You’re mentally rewriting tomorrow’s conversations while trying to fall asleep This is not laziness. This is not “just the way you are.” This is a brain working overtime just to feel baseline okay. What if it’s not just you? Like, what if it's ADHD or anxiety? This isn’t about pathologising your whole personality. It’s about understanding the effort it’s been taking to function — and why you might be so tired. You don’t need to have a diagnosis to want life to feel less heavy. You don’t need to be falling apart to get curious about what’s going on. Sometimes the biggest shift comes from asking: “Wait… does it actually have to be this hard?” Want to talk it through? If this hit home, reach out below. No pressure, no assumptions — we can have a brief chat to begin figuring out what’s going on and how to make it easier.
- Could I really have Adult ADHD?
I was doing pretty okay — Why am I struggling now? You’ve never really thought of yourself as someone with ADHD. You ’ve got a job, friends, a Google-calendar full of colour-coded events. People probably see you as reliable, organised, even “on top of things." But lately? You’ve got 47 unread WhatsApp chats and the idea of replying to any of them makes your chest tighten. Your inbox is full of half-written drafts and emails you can't bear to open. You keep walking into rooms and forgetting why. You’ve started ordering groceries and forgetting to add dinner ingredients — again. You're “functioning,” but barely. And a part of you is starting to wonder: Could this be ADHD? Then your friend recently got diagnosed, and you found yourself nodding along to everything they described. What This Post Is Really About (Hint: You’re Not Imagining It) This isn’t a medical checklist or a diagnostic quiz. This is for the person who’s thinking: “I’ve always held it together… so why does life suddenly feel harder?” “I thought I was just overwhelmed, but now I’m not so sure.” “I relate to ADHD stuff online, but I also feel like I’ve been ‘too successful’ for that to be me.” Let’s talk about what it actually looks like when ADHD hides under “being fine.” High-Functioning Adult ADHD: How It Hides in Plain Sight Here’s the tricky part: ADHD in adults doesn’t always look like what we were told in school. It’s not just hyper kids who can’t sit still or bounce off walls. Sometimes ADHD looks like: Setting five alarms every morning — and still running late. Being hyper-organised at work, but completely forgetting to buy toilet paper (again). Needing a whole day to do one “simple” task because you’ve overthought it to death. Living off coffee, deadlines, and last-minute panic because that’s the only time your brain kicks in. You’ve built systems — mental shortcuts, post-its, rituals, rules.And they’ve worked. Until now. When Your Coping Strategies Stop Working, It Might Be ADHD A big shift — new job, relationship, apartment, pressure — can shake the whole thing loose. Suddenly, the tricks that kept you afloat aren’t cutting it anymore. Maybe: Your new role requires constant context-switching, and you feel like your brain’s buffering all day. You moved house, and now you keep losing everything — keys, thoughts, motivation. You’ve hit your 30s and are realising your “chaotic charm” is actually just chronic stress. It’s not that you’re falling apart. It’s that your environment changed… and your brain can’t keep up the mask. ADHD in Adults: That “Wait, Is This Me?” Moment Adult ADHD often shows up in quiet, exhausting ways: You feel like you’re always running 10 minutes behind your own life. You start every day thinking, Right, today I’ll get on top of things … and end it feeling even more behind. You bounce between hyperfocus and complete inertia — all or nothing, all the time. You’re constantly overstimulated and underwhelmed at the same time. You might not have had teachers flag anything. Maybe you even excelled at school or work — especially if you’re smart, sensitive, or a perfectionist. But brains with ADHD often do a lot behind the scenes to stay afloat — and burnout isn’t a matter of if, but when. Missed Messages, Brain Fog, Constant Catch-Up — Sound Familiar? Sometimes it shows up like: Not replying to texts because the thread got too long and now it’s been four days and you feel bad. Avoiding your email inbox even though it’s full of “tiny” tasks. Feeling emotionally wiped out by simple decisions — like what to eat, or which friend to see. Forgetting plans, cancelling last-minute, then feeling guilty — even though you want to show up. These aren't personality flaws. They’re often the signs of a brain that’s been sprinting to look like it’s walking calmly. You’re Not Lazy. You’re Wired Differently — And That’s Okay A lot of adults only realise they might have ADHD after years of pushing through. They’ve been praised for “doing well” but privately feeling disorganised, inconsistent, or constantly behind. Getting curious about ADHD doesn’t mean you’re looking for excuses. It means you’re ready to start understanding yourself with more compassion. If This Resonates, Let’s Talk You don’t need a label to want life to feel less exhausting. Whether you’re just curious about or seriously wondering what’s going on under the surface, I’m here for grounded, honest conversations — no judgment, no pressure. If you’d like to explore this more, get in touch by clicking below. We can make sense of it together.